It was a beautiful autumn day in London. My window was filled with birds chirping as I awoke in the morning. My yawn accompanied my slow ascent out of bed. When I glanced at my bedside table, I noticed my mobile phone. Upon checking the time, I learned that it was only 8 o'clock. I had the day off. As I stepped out of bed, I walked towards my window and opened it. When I looked outside, I was captivated by the view. It was a sunny day, and the sun's rays reflected off the rooftops of the buildings on the streets. I observed older adults walking their dogs across the street and couples jogging together.
Seeing couples made me think how nice it is that two people in love wake up together, say good morning to each other, smile, and then start jogging together; I can only imagine how beautiful the morning must be for them. It would be a blessing to have someone in my life with whom I could do all of that, someone who would wake up with me every morning, someone whom I could smile at, someone who would hug me when I am feeling down, and someone who would accompany me jogging on weekends. I was so absorbed in my thoughts that I kept staring out the window without realising the time.
Kicking myself back to reality, and as soon as I got changed out of my PJs, I wore a cardigan over my top. Then I headed downstairs and had breakfast. Once again, I was lost in my thoughts as I spooned cornflakes into the bowl and poured milk into it. It almost came to a point where I poured too much milk into the bowl.
As soon as I finished breakfast, I grabbed my Burberry trench coat and put it on. I wrapped my muffler around my neck and wore gloves on my hands. Although it was not freezing, it was still quite cold. Leaving my house, I walked towards the nearby park. I enjoyed walking to the park and just sitting there for hours, watching people, listening to the birds chirp, gazing at the water, and smelling the fragrance of the flowers. These are all my favourite things to do, and I am fortunate to live close to a park. A park is an enjoyable place for me to walk and meet new friends. Every morning I love to hear old Mrs Perkins say "Good Morning, Aisha" to me or watch cute boy John smile at me and want to play with me on the swings.
Upon entering the park, I stood there momentarily to register the view in my mind. I found it to be breathtaking. Autumn's colours were visible in full force, including golden hues and browns and occasional greens and yellows. The park was filled with children playing on the swings and people jogging. The leaves covered the ground, and the trees appeared barren. Those trees looked like an eye that had lost almost all its tears. After taking a step forward, I sauntered over the path leading deep into the orchard. There was so much going on in my head. A feeling of loneliness overtook me. My life has been filled with many hardships over the last few years. My heart had been through a great deal of beating and pain over the years. Nobody was there for me when I needed someone, and those who abandoned and fled never looked back at me. No thought was ever given to how I would feel. I discovered that trusting people isn't intelligent; they will eventually break your heart and move on.
I have loved people a great deal in the past until people hurt me. As a result of an incident with someone I loved, I alienated myself from everyone. Even after all these years, I am still emotionally affected by the incident, which caused me considerable pain. I was shocked at the behaviour of others; I was shocked at what I witnessed. As a result of my experience, I have learned not to trust anyone until they show their true colours. Your true friends are only those who remain by your side through thick and thin, who stand by you even during your darkest days, and who help you get up when you have fallen. Your life should be filled with those types of people. I had lost everything.
During my younger years, I was a dreamer and a person who loved life to the fullest. Back then, I dreamt of running through jungles with my arms raised, singing my heart out and having a good time. When walking in the park, I was the type of person who could feel the wind rushing against their face and hear the sweet melody of spring. I was the person who loved hearing birds chirp because it gave me a sense of happiness. Something was stealing my happiness from me, and I was determined to regain it. My life had to change a lot to be who I am today.
I was contemplating all of this while walking underneath trees. Almost all or most of the leaves had fallen from these half-barren trees. Leaves were falling on my head. By extending my hand toward the sky, I let a leaf land on the palm of my hand. The leaf captivated my attention. It was as if I had saved it from falling or as if I had stopped it from getting injured. It had been saved from being trampled upon by people, much like my heart had been trampled upon. The difference was that no one rescued my heart. I placed the leaf gently beside the trunk of the tree. As I walked, my knee suddenly hit the edge of a bench; I felt it would be wise to sit down and relax for a while.
Nearby, I noticed a hedge and many flowers. I was invigorated by the fragrance of the flowers. My chest expanded as I took a deep breath and absorbed every last bit of it. Upon closing my eyes, I felt something. I was captivated by the sweet smell of pollen. A bee was hovering over a flower petal when I opened my eyes. So much foliage protected the flower, and the bee appeared interested in its pollen. However, it was unable to penetrate the flower to reach the anthers. I watched the bee struggle to enter the flower, wondering what it would do next. Every time it circled the flower, it would somehow fail to enter. But, despite my low expectations, the bee eventually managed to get inside the flower instead of giving up and moving on to another flower.
The bee's tenacity and perseverance left me bewildered and impressed. As I was thinking, I made an insightful observation; "sometimes the struggle is exactly what we need". Our ability to accomplish our goals would be crippled if we did not face struggles in life. We would not be as strong as we could have been, and we would not be able to learn to fly. I thought we humans should follow the bee's example, which took pollen from that anther. It is wise not to give up on life if something does not work out as planned. We should move forward in life and never lose hope. We are the only ones who can make our lives pleasant. No one can assist us in this endeavour. Helping oneself will benefit one in the long run. And having made this observation, I felt pretty satisfied at this point.
I lacked self-respect; if you do not respect yourself, you will not be respected by others. My self-esteem had been eroded. I had become disillusioned with myself. It was time for me to stand up again. Getting up and walking again was imperative for me. I then had to run. If I did not run, I would be left behind. Nobody can escape the ravages of time and tide. I had no one to turn to. No one in this cruel world was going to help me. No one was going to care about me. So changing my life and progressing in it was something I had to do for myself. So it was crucial that I be happy.
My smile spread across my face as I rose from the bench. I began to walk back towards the park entrance, but this time I had pleasant thoughts in my mind. What matters if I do not have a significant other in my life? What does it matter if the people that I had, left me? It would not be suitable for me to allow myself to be let down and shed my precious tears on the people who did not care about me at all. I ask myself why I should endure considerable pain every day and why I should be the one who suffers when others seem to be unaffected. As I walked, I became more and more enthused and smiled. My life would be enriched by someone coming into it at the right time. I would wait until the time was right. Until then, I had to get my life back on track and remain true to myself. It was once again necessary for me to be the cheerful Aisha. Why should I change? Many people in the world would appreciate me for who I am, and we could establish a connection. My sad feelings are no longer necessary, nor do I need to feel lonely. Having myself was the greatest gift I could receive from God.
It was a pleasant autumn morning in London as the leaves fell on my head. This day will remain in my memory for the rest of my life. It was the day the bees taught me a valuable life lesson. It was the day when I smiled again. The day I decided I would make a change in my life and return to normalcy. Instead of wasting precious time and tears, I would learn to be happy again. Then, as I walked back to the park entrance, I paused for a moment and observed the scene around me; the smiles on people's faces, the birds and trees, the colourful flowers, and nodded in agreement. Then, walking out of the park, I smiled at myself. Upon returning home, I felt like I had become entirely different.
